I'm Barry Slunt, Executive Creative Chief of Chernobyl Cottom Sausages Communications Group.
The catastrophic news of Michael Jackson's sad and devastating transformation into a corpse last week, may've left the Earth confused and somewhat saddened, but the sudden departure of Jackson's soul from his flesh has undoubtedly turned the media landscape into an upside-down branding paradise of massive and obvious proportions.
As the logo of Jackson's spirit hovered online via the BBC News website, weeping media audiences cannibalised eachother via Twitter, clamouring to watch Ceefax on YouTube as they starved themselves to veryify the death of a rich, musical paedophile.
Unleasing the power of Jackson's brand via social media, civilisation collapsed as everyone in the world played Thriller and blogged AT THE SAME TIME.
On iPods across the universe, a digital Satan made of user generated content materialsed on desktops, announcing a new Jackson-shaped epoch in which everything we ever do on the internet from now on will be influenced by Michael Jackson's decision to die near a camera.
Thanks to the unique power of the Jackson brand, advertisers and marketers can look forward to a future where all brands will molest children and linger pathetically in the minds of shallow, sentimental audiences everywhere.
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