Hey Michael, listen. It's Bono here. Look. I've got some bad news. We're gonna have to pull out of Glastonbury this year. How come? Oh, it's terrible. I've, er... It's um... my back!
No, honestly. Seriously mate, I'm in fuckin' agony. I can't take my sunglasses off.
I know, I know, we're all er... disappointed. It would've been amazing. Because we'd er... written a song...
What? Oh of course, yeah - it was a special new song. Just for Glastonbury. And er... God was gonna be there too. So I had to tell him first you know, before I told I you. And God was like, "Shit man, I'm so sorry. I was so looking forward to it. You know, I'd booked the hotel and everything. But I guess if you're sick man, then shit - "
What? Is there nothing God can do? No. I don't think so, Michael.
Good bye now.
UPDATE: Just heard a bit more news about this. Seems Bono went in hospital for some kind of immaculate conception and they spazzed up his epidural or something. What a nightmare!
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