1. Cunty owl
2. Sneaky owl
3. Mother fucking owl
4. Crimin-owl
5. Definitely not the sort of owl to have round kids or do a Disney film. More like those 3D armoured owls in what was that called again? film you know last year
6. An owl married to a graceful young ostrich from Hong Kong
7. The kind of owl that, I suspect, would get short shrift from Chris Packham and the BBC wildlife crew
8. The kind of owl that makes politicians shit their nests
9. An unwise owl! And whoever heard of one of those, hmm?
10. Wapping great bastard owl
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